The angsty post

[timeripple]

Back from spring break with the parents, and a bit at loose ends. Scheduling fun as always. What’s even more fun is fending off the parents’ attempts to get me to do something with my life. I think part of my problem is that as a child, I never envisioned myself as being grown-up, and even in college I couldn’t form clear possibilities about the future, immediate or distant. My dad thinks that grad school would be an excellent way of passing a few years, just to be doing something. Every single professor I’ve talked to says the opposite. He says that I should get a PhD in something or other and then write for the New York Times. What he doesn’t seem to grasp is that I have had it with academia, at least for now. I couldn’t bear to put all my time and energy into something if my heart wasn’t in it. It’s hard enough right now, when I’m taking easy classes and nobody expects anything of me. Grad school would be hell. The brain and heart are not wholly unconnected, you know? Biologically or otherwise.

My mother, having once heard me express a vague interest in publishing, has taken to ordering books with titles like “Careers for Bookworms” and “Careers in Publishing: How To Get Started” from Amazon.

I’m not sure which I find more infuriating.

Comments

[kayselkiemoon.livejournal.com]

taken to ordering books with titles like “Careers for Bookworms” and “Careers in Publishing: How To Get Started” from Amazon.

hahaha! that first one sounds entertaining/interesting. my mom bought me a couple job books, starting the summer before my senior year. still have 'em, staring at me from the bottom shelf. *sigh/grin*

when I was a senior, my parents thought it would be good to go straight to grad school and get a degree, because of it looking better to schools and employers or something like that. but they changed their tune (fortunately!).

I think one should know that it's what they really want to be doing, love to be learning/preparing for, before going into grad school, especially a PhD program! of course, in my case, my shillyshallying is partly because I can't make up my mind, but part is that I wasn't ready.

as a child, I never envisioned myself as being grown-up, and even in college I couldn’t form clear possibilities about the future, immediate or distant.

my imaginings somehow jumped over some bits of the becoming-adult process, and were never specific as to job. I remember dreaming about being 16 and all grown-up (ha.). I dreamt of being older and having a husband, kids, dogs, and house. but the other pertinent details and how I got there? fortunately not supplied. hrmph.

[satakieli.livejournal.com]

Ugh. Grad school without a burning desire to be there must be the seventh circle of hell.

Good luck finding what you want to do and avoiding becoming infuriated at your parents as you do so.